Chapter 2
Formative years
I never had a lot of friends. To be honest, the only long term friend i had/have is one, says how 'rich' Im regarding friendships. Until 10, i was an ok kid and i was in a convent school run by very lovely nuns. I had decent headless friendships like any other kid who are under 10. I was neither the studious type, nor the dumb one, Im a perfect averager there. Ive had decent friends and was half decent health wise. My friends and teachers neither adored me nor hated me, which was fine for me. I escaped through my childhood pretty much unnoticed, which is one of the reason why i dont have any memory regarding my early childhood.
Then i was made to change school as my first school did not had higher classes. And that was the turning point in my life. I joined another school midway, and i found it hard to get friends there. My parents started to climb up their ladder, career wise, so they had little time to check on me, and me being an average student, they joined me to the highest demanding course academically, which is where i started to feel drained. That school was a nightmare. It was a boys school, and friendships between classmates were long set before i joined them, so i was always the odd one out. I was not the healthiest of the bunch and certainly not the good looking type, so they never tried to add me to their class. And i never felt really bad about it since i enjoyed my loneliness.
And the first major setback happened to me. My mom got sick, and that started to create problems in my family, Eventhough i was a loner, it started to affect me. I dint had anyone to talk about anything, before mom was the one who used to look me after, now i had no one to rely on and things started to become hard for me. During those times, i hated to eat, and with none to look after me, i started to skip meal to that extend that, i only ate once a day, which made my already weak stature worse. Kids in my school found easy target, but one thing im good at was to be invisible. Thanks to that skill, i never got bullied through out my life. I hated days as i dint had anything to do or anyone to talk. So i started thinking a lot, one thing lead to another, and i started reading books. The first book i got my hand on was mahabharatha just because there was a painting of a nude lady inside that book. Being curious i started to like it and instantly became an avid reader.
Next up was 1001 arabian nights, and no points for guessing why i chose that book, eventhough these books are fantasy, they began to lay some strong ideas and values in my mind. Together with reading, i started to think a lot, about everything. Those years summer vacations were the worst part in my life. Everyone around were in the age group of my elder brother, i was always the younger brother of their friend, so they never added me to their group. So i was always inside the house, just laying around or reading. Since i ate much less, i got anemia, my parents wondered what was wrong with me, even i did and it started to become worse.
Matters in school were even worser than my health. I started to fail on all subjects and found it hard to cope with the intense academic plans, it was a matter of time before the principal called my parents to my office. And that day was the worst days of my life until then. He said i had disorders, that im borderline autistic, and my lean unhealthy looks was promising to his theory. I was almost transferred to a special school, thanks to my mom and her illness, she fought hard for me, and i was changed to another academic plan, state syllabus, one thing i was able to cope. I knew i did not wanted to change school, eventhough i hated my current school. Eventhough i did not had any friends, nor none knew me there, i took it as my advantage as i could never live my loner life anywhere else. I joined the new class, which was a special english class. Every students there were too self centered, even worse, it was the only class in my year that had girls. So everyone where busy trying to impress them, again i was an easy target there to make fun of. The class was a bit over crowded and i nvr found a place to sit. I was made to shuttle from chairs to chairs as none wanted to sit with me. Then one day, the principal came to the class and said he need 5 brave volunteers to do the sacrifice for the class. As the class was crowded he need 5 people to volunteer to get transferred to another class and went on to preach how great it is to sacrifice for others. Without any hesitation i stood up, and the principal was happy to get a volunteer without much compulsion. He made the whole class applaud for me. My first applause. My first sacrifice. I was happy for unknown reason, guess my class mates were happy too to get rid of an outcast....
8th standard. Where my life started to change. Made some good friends there, still my academic struggles were a mess, but i learned to survive. I started to be active in sports, and to my surprise i was better at it! Slowly i started to gain friends since they started to recognize me as someone good in sports. Life started to change indeed.
Still everything else remained to be a mess. But i was least worried about it. For the first time in life, i got a best friend, and then another one. First time i started to talk to some person on regular basis. It was fun. Life was splendid, we spend most of the time together, those guys imparted me interests like music, football, movies etc. Before i was just a reader and lover of old movies, that came in the regional channel. Those 2 years were the best. Another major influence in my life was my history teacher. She is one of the brightest people ive ever met. She was the one who formed my character if you ask me. She made me interested in news, and i started to read newspaper because of her. Every bits and pieces of knowledge i have in my life, i owe it to her. Too bad, she wont even remember me, as i was her silent follower. I used my power of being invisible to the maximum, she never even noticed a disciple in me. I was happy that way
And i became strong academically :o...I just focused myself on studies, thanks to my friends, anyways, i became someone who used to be awful, but not anymore. And i passed out of that schools in a good way. And life for once seemed to be happy and everything was coming my way. Life was full of fun, football music and books.
Formative years
Then i was made to change school as my first school did not had higher classes. And that was the turning point in my life. I joined another school midway, and i found it hard to get friends there. My parents started to climb up their ladder, career wise, so they had little time to check on me, and me being an average student, they joined me to the highest demanding course academically, which is where i started to feel drained. That school was a nightmare. It was a boys school, and friendships between classmates were long set before i joined them, so i was always the odd one out. I was not the healthiest of the bunch and certainly not the good looking type, so they never tried to add me to their class. And i never felt really bad about it since i enjoyed my loneliness.
And the first major setback happened to me. My mom got sick, and that started to create problems in my family, Eventhough i was a loner, it started to affect me. I dint had anyone to talk about anything, before mom was the one who used to look me after, now i had no one to rely on and things started to become hard for me. During those times, i hated to eat, and with none to look after me, i started to skip meal to that extend that, i only ate once a day, which made my already weak stature worse. Kids in my school found easy target, but one thing im good at was to be invisible. Thanks to that skill, i never got bullied through out my life. I hated days as i dint had anything to do or anyone to talk. So i started thinking a lot, one thing lead to another, and i started reading books. The first book i got my hand on was mahabharatha just because there was a painting of a nude lady inside that book. Being curious i started to like it and instantly became an avid reader.
Next up was 1001 arabian nights, and no points for guessing why i chose that book, eventhough these books are fantasy, they began to lay some strong ideas and values in my mind. Together with reading, i started to think a lot, about everything. Those years summer vacations were the worst part in my life. Everyone around were in the age group of my elder brother, i was always the younger brother of their friend, so they never added me to their group. So i was always inside the house, just laying around or reading. Since i ate much less, i got anemia, my parents wondered what was wrong with me, even i did and it started to become worse.
Matters in school were even worser than my health. I started to fail on all subjects and found it hard to cope with the intense academic plans, it was a matter of time before the principal called my parents to my office. And that day was the worst days of my life until then. He said i had disorders, that im borderline autistic, and my lean unhealthy looks was promising to his theory. I was almost transferred to a special school, thanks to my mom and her illness, she fought hard for me, and i was changed to another academic plan, state syllabus, one thing i was able to cope. I knew i did not wanted to change school, eventhough i hated my current school. Eventhough i did not had any friends, nor none knew me there, i took it as my advantage as i could never live my loner life anywhere else. I joined the new class, which was a special english class. Every students there were too self centered, even worse, it was the only class in my year that had girls. So everyone where busy trying to impress them, again i was an easy target there to make fun of. The class was a bit over crowded and i nvr found a place to sit. I was made to shuttle from chairs to chairs as none wanted to sit with me. Then one day, the principal came to the class and said he need 5 brave volunteers to do the sacrifice for the class. As the class was crowded he need 5 people to volunteer to get transferred to another class and went on to preach how great it is to sacrifice for others. Without any hesitation i stood up, and the principal was happy to get a volunteer without much compulsion. He made the whole class applaud for me. My first applause. My first sacrifice. I was happy for unknown reason, guess my class mates were happy too to get rid of an outcast....
8th standard. Where my life started to change. Made some good friends there, still my academic struggles were a mess, but i learned to survive. I started to be active in sports, and to my surprise i was better at it! Slowly i started to gain friends since they started to recognize me as someone good in sports. Life started to change indeed.
Still everything else remained to be a mess. But i was least worried about it. For the first time in life, i got a best friend, and then another one. First time i started to talk to some person on regular basis. It was fun. Life was splendid, we spend most of the time together, those guys imparted me interests like music, football, movies etc. Before i was just a reader and lover of old movies, that came in the regional channel. Those 2 years were the best. Another major influence in my life was my history teacher. She is one of the brightest people ive ever met. She was the one who formed my character if you ask me. She made me interested in news, and i started to read newspaper because of her. Every bits and pieces of knowledge i have in my life, i owe it to her. Too bad, she wont even remember me, as i was her silent follower. I used my power of being invisible to the maximum, she never even noticed a disciple in me. I was happy that way
And i became strong academically :o...I just focused myself on studies, thanks to my friends, anyways, i became someone who used to be awful, but not anymore. And i passed out of that schools in a good way. And life for once seemed to be happy and everything was coming my way. Life was full of fun, football music and books.
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